Happy birthday, my precious.
You’re ten today!In the morning, when I sent you to school, you sighed and said, “I’m ten now, ten times the responsibility.” (You looked very cute when you said that.)
I said, “No, no, not responsibility, it’s ten times the possibility.”
This afternoon, I will take you to the Apple store to buy you a big gift. But actually, the gift I want you to have the most is a capability. I hope this capability will help you navigate difficulties and seize opportunities in any environment in the future.
This capability isn’t called “strength.” “Strength” is just not being defeated by any unfavorable circumstances.
This capability is called “anti-fragility,” as mentioned in the book “Antifragile.” This capability allows you to benefit from adversity. (If you have the chance, please make sure to read this book.)
With this capability, your life will have countless possibilities, just as I envisioned for myself.
Before you turned ten, my main responsibility was to protect you and ensure you had a happy growing-up space without exposure to negative things. Of course, you’ve already done many things well on your own, like getting up and going to bed by yourself, doing your homework without my supervision, and even making simple meals like microwave-steamed eggs and doing your laundry and organizing your clothes. (You’re truly amazing!)
After you turn ten, I believe you will have the ability to face more complex environments directly.
So, we can discuss the following action plan:
– Riding your bike to school and back on your own.
– Spending a summer independently at a Chinese summer camp.
– Using the gas stove and oven independently.
(You can suggest the rest on your own.)
I’m not a tiger mom, never have been. I don’t have the Chinese mentality of “hoping my child becomes a dragon or phoenix.” I don’t want you to become a successful person (although success is nice), I just hope that you can remain “composed” in any environment.
These are the words I wrote this morning. Again, Happy Birthday!